A Mountain Out of a Molehill

“There are some things in this world you rely on, like a sure bet. And when they let you down, shifting from where you've carefully placed them, it shakes your faith, right where you stand.” 
― Sarah Dessen, Someone Like You

What a long time it has been since I have written.  Being busy is good - to a point.  In this decade of life, I am beginning to have different "wants".  Whatever I have done in my life I have done whole-heartedly and when the going got very tough for me, somehow I forged ahead.  There are people that have always been in my corner.  In today's world, "I got your back" is used more often.  Sadly, people seem to change.

I have discovered that it is true what I have seen written.  People who expect things given to them also resent you when you don't "come through" on something seemingly insignificant.  It is crazy.  What is so amazing is that it has happened to me from a number of directions in recent weeks.  You find out people aren't who you think they are. People become angry and seemingly embittered when their vision of your own life becomes broken.

Today I am tired.  I feel beaten.  I feel used. I am disappointed. I just got the greatest message via text from someone I love to the moon and back.  It has lifted my spirits.  An acceptance of my point of view.  I am grateful.  Someday maybe others will also understand that not only sticks and stones break bones, but words do hurt, but sometimes no words hurt just as much.  Apologies go a long way. Perhaps I am overly sensitive because I am no longer in the spring of my life.  It is definitely autumn in this house - at the very least the dog days of summer.  Maybe I am supposed to get used to being dismissed and being made to feel stupid and foolish. But I will set my compass in a different direction and sail a new course.

Tomorrow is a new day.

Yes this is enigmatic.  It is meant to be.